Liberty Lifeguard To Obama: There's Already An App For That

Liberty Lifeguard To Obama: There's Already An App For That 06/22/2009

by Dacia Nichol

The iPhone phenomenon could really teach the government a thing or two about new policies. See, someone already came up with all those new fancy ideas for financial industry regulation. The trick is that you have to actually press the button to make them run, i.e., enforce the laws to make them work. Nah - let's program a new one in less time than the other 41 took to create. READ: Imagine spending hours to write a new iPhone "fart" app that only has one sound when all the other "fart" apps have at least 3 and are more realistic. Sorry for the visual... Just to be clear, in this analogy it would be the government that indeed lacks the flatulence versatility.

Guess this is a recurring theme (reinventing the wheel) for Mista 44. Along with the one where the Constitution is some old document that is merely full of suggestions regarding what government can and can't do.

In case you missed it, the latest on the expansive government to-do list involves the following overhaul for the U.S. financial system:

1. New powers to the Federal Reserve (that uber-powerful non-governmental body of money that's doing Congress's job for some reason) to oversee the ENTIRE financial system. All the guys who own you will have to answer to the prez's Treasury puppet if they screw up...because he'll yell at them more behind closed doors...?

2. A new consumer protection agency (not to be confused with the other agencies that already exist for this purpose) created to make sure nobody selling you a product treats you like a competent and responsible individual. Good thing AA's program doesn't fall under their jurisdiction - 12 steps is just waaay too many to remember!

The recurring theme is to create more regulation [stifling business is extra credit] to make up for all the regulation that exists to defeat what the existing regulation was also trying to accomplish in the name of prior regulation failure. Basically, we tried using the red pen when we took the test, so now we're gonna try the blue one....same answers, just a different colored pen...using bigger words, printed on much more expensive paper, and giving more control and discretion to the teacher doing the grading...you know...so her "pet" can benefit most.

Let's think about #1 here - murder is illegal (sans unborn baby murder that is). Still, people murder [want to make more money than everyone else]. Application of 44's logic here would conclude that we need to gather all the other murderers who got off on technicalities [the banks that run the Fed] and form them into a council on the best way to carry out punishment for murder [the new powers] while concluding that torturing and THEN killing is the best method to better deter the crime [the new consumer protection agency that destroys competition]. If that doesn't work, blame Bush. A little extreme by comparison...but the drift should be had.

Actually as it turns out, rehabilitation in Burmuda is more in line for behavioral correction...

Maybe it was the wrong version of American history being taught over the years, but doesn't the story about the 4th of July have something to do with a big powerful centralized government overreaching and becoming quite tyrannical in its enforcement measures? No wait - that was different. How about the one where this really charismatic guy nationalized a bunch of stuff in his country (talk about mad economic skillz!) and told people it was in their best interest - after all, it was the Jews' fault - and then later tried to take over the world after crushing all dissenters in his own country? No no no...not the same scenario.

Aha! How about the one where the guy is brought forth as the messianic savior, spends the greatest nation of the world into bankruptcy, buries the Congress in paper while calling for unexpected night time voting to deter the democratic process and shutting the minority out completely, and cries "emergency" to push his agenda through at breakneck pace which includes gaining control over every financial and economic industry in the nation by simply pretending to solve a problem which already had a solution that wasn't being enforced?

So yeah - Obama's new plan is a bad idea.

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